the sour notes

I was teaching my weekly violin lesson to my sixteen year old student. I’ve been using the Suzuki Method book with her and teaching her proper technique and note recognition. Usually our lessons are full of cheerful conversation and positive pep talks but last night I just wasn’t feeling it. We’d reached a challenging piece in the book and spent the first half hour of the lesson going over the notes. I heard myself saying drying, “let’s try these two measures again.” “Remember to use your whole bow.” “Keep your wrist down.” “Stay with the beat.”

Baby It's Cold Outside - Ray Charles & Betty Carter
Lucky Stars - Dean Friedman

I was frustrated with my humorless instruction and the repetitive, nonsensical quality of the music. My poor student looked about as miserable as I felt and wasn’t responding as usual to my instruction. I felt terrible that I couldn’t create the lighthearted quality we usually have in our lessons. I’m good friends with my student and know that depending on how she’s feeling on any particular day, her lessons with me can be productive, or just plain tragic. This night was tragic for sure.

Empty Boulevard - Robert Musci & Giovanni Venosta
Susanna's Still Alive - The Cardiacs

makes me think of sad little Asian girls